4 Expert Tips for Handling Difficult Parents

4 Expert Tips for Handling Difficult Parents

a stubborn older woman refuses help

Caregiving can be a challenging and emotionally taxing role, requiring immense dedication and patience. It’s important to remember that you are not alone. There are numerous resources and support systems available to help ease the burden and ensure both caregivers and those they assist receive the care they need. The Arbors and The Ivy Assisted Living Communities offer several options and varying levels of care, including brief respite stays in MA and CT. We encourage you to learn how we can help.

You are not alone

Caring for aging parents can feel overwhelming, especially when dealing with challenging behaviors, tough decisions, or emotional complexities. Caregivers often feel frustration, worry, or guilt, wondering if they’re doing enough or making the right choices. These feelings are valid and shared by many. While caregiving is a labor of love, it comes with challenges that test patience and resilience. Recognizing that you’re not alone is the first step toward managing this journey.

Help is available for caregivers through support groups, counseling, and community resources. Connecting with others in similar situations can offer relief, understanding, and practical advice. Organizations and professionals specializing in elder care can also provide tailored guidance. Seeking assistance isn’t a sign of failure—it ensures you and your loved ones get the support you need. You don’t have to handle caregiving alone—help is just a conversation away.

4 expert tips for handling difficult parents

Handling difficult parents can be a challenging and emotional experience, especially when trying to balance respect with setting boundaries. However, with the right strategies and mindset, it’s possible to foster a healthier relationship and reduce tension. Here are four expert tips to help you navigate these situations effectively.

1. A stubborn aging parent

A stubborn aging parent can be challenging, especially when their resistance stems from a desire to maintain independence or fear of losing control. It’s important to approach the situation with empathy and patience, acknowledging their feelings while gently encouraging collaboration. Avoid power struggles, as these can escalate tensions and hinder effective communication. Instead, focus on fostering a sense of partnership by involving them in decisions and validating their concerns.

Expert tip: Frame choices in a way that empowers them, such as offering two acceptable options instead of making demands—this can help them feel more in control and open to compromise.

2. A negative aging parent

A negative aging parent can be an emotionally draining experience, but approaching the situation with empathy and understanding is crucial. It’s important to recognize that their negativity may stem from feelings of fear, frustration, or a loss of independence. Listening actively and validating their emotions can help diffuse tension and show them that their concerns are heard. Avoid taking negative comments personally and instead, try to redirect conversations to focus on positive aspects or solutions to their worries.

Expert tip: Practice setting healthy boundaries while remaining compassionate—asserting limits on unconstructive behavior can protect your well-being while fostering a healthier dynamic.

3. An irrational aging parent

An irrational aging parent can be challenging, but maintaining patience and empathy is crucial. Attempt to identify the underlying causes of their irrational behavior, such as fear, frustration, or confusion, as this can help guide your response. Clear communication, paired with consistent routines, can provide a sense of stability and reassurance for them. It is equally important to manage your emotions and seek support when needed to avoid becoming overwhelmed.

Expert tip: Approach conversations with calmness and use phrases that validate their feelings while gently redirecting irrational thoughts toward constructive solutions.

4. A depressed aging parent

Depression in aging parents can be challenging to address, but empathy and understanding are vital. Begin by fostering open and honest communication, allowing them to express their thoughts and feelings without fear of judgment. Encourage activities that promote a sense of purpose, such as hobbies, volunteering, or spending time with loved ones. Additionally, gently suggest professional help when necessary, such as therapy or support groups, to provide them with specialized guidance and a better emotional framework.

Expert tip: Listen attentively and express genuine interest in their concerns, while subtly encouraging small, achievable steps that promote positivity and engagement with life. It may also be helpful to get them professional help managing their depression.

By offering compassion, patience, and understanding, you can make a meaningful difference in their recovery journey. Remember, supporting someone with depression is about being present and encouraging while respecting their pace and needs.

Prioritizing your well-being: self-care and support

Caring for aging parents with complex needs can be both rewarding and challenging. Caregivers often feel overwhelmed, balancing responsibilities while ensuring their loved ones’ well-being. Prioritizing your own health isn’t a luxury — it’s essential for providing effective care. Here are some strategies to help caregivers focus on self-care and seek support:

  • Set boundaries for your time and energy: Establish clear limits to avoid burnout. Communicate these boundaries with your aging parent and other family members to ensure everyone respects the time you need for yourself.
  • Practice regular self-care routines: Engage in activities that bring you joy and relaxation, whether it’s exercising, meditating, reading, or pursuing a hobby. Self-care can help reduce stress and sustain your mental health.
  • Seek support from friends and family: Don’t hesitate to ask for and accept help from others. Sharing responsibilities can lighten the load, and having someone to talk to can offer emotional relief.
  • Join support groups for caregivers: Connecting with others who share your experiences can provide comfort, practical advice, and a sense of camaraderie. Many local and online communities host support groups specifically for caregivers.
  • Stay informed and educate yourself: Learn about your parent’s specific conditions or challenges. Understanding their needs can help you anticipate issues and make informed decisions.
  • Look into senior living options: Exploring alternatives like assisted living or respite care can alleviate some of the caregiving burden. These options provide professional care for your parent in a comfortable environment, allowing you to focus on your well-being while ensuring their needs are met.

Taking care of yourself not only benefits your personal health but also ensures you can provide the best support to your loved ones. Remember, it’s okay to seek help and give yourself time to recharge—caregiving is a marathon, not a sprint.

Contact The Arbors and The Ivy to learn about senior living options today

At The Arbors and The Ivy Assisted Living Communities, we are dedicated to providing compassionate and professional care tailored to meet the unique needs of seniors in MA and CT. Our communities offer a warm and supportive environment where residents can thrive and enjoy life to the fullest. Whether you’re exploring options for yourself or a loved one, our team is here to guide you every step of the way. Contact us today to learn more about how we can help you or your family transition to a vibrant senior living community.

Request More Information – Amherst

NOTE: Your privacy is important to us. We’ll never share your details or spam your inbox.

Request More Information – Chicopee

NOTE: Your privacy is important to us. We’ll never share your details or spam your inbox.

Request More Information – Greenfield

NOTE: Your privacy is important to us. We’ll never share your details or spam your inbox.

Request More Information – Westfield

NOTE: Your privacy is important to us. We’ll never share your details or spam your inbox.

Request More Information – Dracut

NOTE: Your privacy is important to us. We’ll never share your details or spam your inbox.

Request More Information – Stoneham

NOTE: Your privacy is important to us. We’ll never share your details or spam your inbox.

Request More Information – Taunton

NOTE: Your privacy is important to us. We’ll never share your details or spam your inbox.

Request More Information – Ellington

NOTE: Your privacy is important to us. We’ll never share your details or spam your inbox.

Request More Information – Watertown

NOTE: Your privacy is important to us. We’ll never share your details or spam your inbox.

Instant Access to Free Guide

If you’re unsure what Assisted Living looks like in real life, whether there is a difference with nursing homes or a desire to see how community life unfolds, then this guide is exactly what you need.

A guide to discover the Care Team and a Typical Day in Assisted Living.

Simply Enter Your Details to Access Guide

NOTE: Your privacy is important to us. We’ll never share your details nor spam your inbox.

Instant Access to Free Guide

This checklist will help to make sure you are getting the most out of your visit to The Arbors.

The list details what important questions to ask during your visit so you are able to make an enlightened choice and find the best assisted living community for your needs.

Simply Enter Your Details to Access Guide

NOTE: Your privacy is important to us. We’ll never share your details nor spam your inbox.

Instant Access to Free Guide

Assisted living can be a touchy subject. No matter how you approach it, your parent is likely to have objections to something.

As you help them transition to a new stage of life, it helps to be prepared with answers to their questions and concerns.

Simply Enter Your Details to Access Guide

NOTE: Your privacy is important to us. We’ll never share your details nor spam your inbox.

Instant Access to Free Guide

Navigating adult sibling relationships can be a challenge, but coming together for the sake of your parent is important.

In this guide, you’ll learn about common sibling conflicts that arise when caring for parents, strategies for getting siblings on board, and where to turn to for help.

Simply Enter Your Details to Access Guide

NOTE: Your privacy is important to us. We’ll never share your details nor spam your inbox.

Instant Access to Free Guide

In this guide, you’ll learn about the difference between assisted living and memory care, how healthcare professionals are trained in dementia care, common features of a memory care community, and questions you should ask when exploring your memory care options.

Simply Enter Your Details to Access Guide

NOTE: Your privacy is important to us. We’ll never share your details nor spam your inbox.

Instant Access to Free Guide

In this guide, you’ll learn about the difference between Alzheimer’s and dementia, including the early symptoms of dementia; the seven stages of dementia and the symptoms that typically accompany each one; and the signs it’s time to start exploring your memory care options.

Simply Enter Your Details to Access Guide

NOTE: Your privacy is important to us. We’ll never share your details nor spam your inbox.

Instant Access to Free Guide

A Guide to the Most Common Family Caregiver Challenges Associated with Caring for an Aging Parent.

You’ll learn about the true costs of being a family caregiver, common family conflicts that can occur when caring for parents, and some of the unexpected challenges of caregiving.

Simply Enter Your Details to Access Guide

NOTE: Your privacy is important to us. We’ll never share your details nor spam your inbox.

Instant Access to Free Guide

Have you had to cut back your hours at work to care for your mom? Are you worried about administering medications or injections?

Have you stopped getting together with friends, either because you don’t have the time or you’re too exhausted? Are you becoming the invisible second patient?

Simply Enter Your Details to Access Guide

NOTE: Your privacy is important to us. We’ll never share your details nor spam your inbox.

Instant Access to Free Guide

In this eBook, you’ll learn how to talk with family and friends about caregiving challenges, how to deal with a parent who is resistant to help, how to get more caregiving help from your siblings, and how to keep your job while caregiving.

Simply Enter Your Details to Access Guide

NOTE: Your privacy is important to us. We’ll never share your details nor spam your inbox.

Instant Access to Free Guide

Moving to assisted living is a life-changing event.

This guide provides tips and ideas on downsizing, what to pack and how to make the transition smooth for your senior parent.

Simply Enter Your Details to Access Guide

NOTE: Your privacy is important to us. We’ll never share your details nor spam your inbox.

Instant Access to Free Guide

No one ever plans to be sick or disabled, and disasters, man-made or natural, can happen at any time, anywhere.

Yet older adults are among the most vulnerable during a crisis. That’s why it’s critical that seniors, and those who care for them, prepare for emergencies.

Simply Enter Your Details to Access Guide

NOTE: Your privacy is important to us. We’ll never share your details nor spam your inbox.

Instant Access to Free Guide

Has your dad stopped getting together for lunches or outings with friends or visits with neighbors? Have you stopped enjoying time with your parents because you’re a caregiver?

Choosing an assisted living community is a big decision. Learn how to find the right one for you and your loved one.

Simply Enter Your Details to Access Guide

NOTE: Your privacy is important to us. We’ll never share your details nor spam your inbox.

Instant Access to Free Guide

Where do you start searching for assisted living or memory care communities?

What qualities in a community should you look for? How do you know you made the right decision?

Simply Enter Your Details to Access Guide

NOTE: Your privacy is important to us. We’ll never share your details nor spam your inbox.

Instant Access to Free Guide

Does your loved one need more support than what they are getting? Would they benefit from some assistance with daily activities?

In this guide, you’ll find answers to the most common questions asked about assisted living.

Simply Enter Your Details to Access Guide

NOTE: Your privacy is important to us. We’ll never share your details nor spam your inbox.

Instant Access to Free Guide

Has your aging parent recently lost interest in activities they used to enjoy? Have you noticed a change in their mood and behavior?

This guide will provide you with resources and tools on how to identify depression, what are the common causes of depression, and how to promote mental health in your aging loved one.


Simply Enter Your Details to Access Guide

NOTE: Your privacy is important to us. We’ll never share your details nor spam your inbox.

Instant Access to Free Guide

Is your parent or loved one depressed, or just in a bad mood?

What does medication and illness have to do with depression?

How can you help? In this guide, you will be provided with answers to the difficult questions you may have about depression.

Simply Enter Your Details to Access Guide

NOTE: Your privacy is important to us. We’ll never share your details nor spam your inbox.

Instant Access to Free Guide

Becoming a family caregiver can be a rewarding experience. It also has its challenges.

There are many questions to answer before making the decision to take care of a loved one.

This guide will provide answers to questions you may have on this topic.

Simply Enter Your Details to Access Guide

NOTE: Your privacy is important to us. We’ll never share your details nor spam your inbox.

Instant Access to Free Guide

Difficult behaviors in elderly adults are very common. They may be an expression of frustration your loved one feels or a symptom of early stages of dementia or Alzheimer’s.

This guide will provide you with skills and knowledge on how to handle difficult behaviors your aging parent may be experiencing.

Simply Enter Your Details to Access Guide

NOTE: Your privacy is important to us. We’ll never share your details nor spam your inbox.

Instant Access to Free Guide

Talking to your aging parent about moving to an assisted living community isn’t easy.

Often, many adult children avoid bringing it up because it can be a sensitive topic.

This guide will provide you with helpful tips and insight on how to have a productive conversation with your parent and siblings regarding your parent’s future.

Simply Enter Your Details to Access Guide

NOTE: Your privacy is important to us. We’ll never share your details nor spam your inbox.

Instant Access to Free Guide

Are you considering assisted living for yourself or a loved one but are hesitant about the cost? Assisted living costs, services and amenities vary greatly among the last and most expensive communities, and costs are higher in some states than others.

This guide will answer questions you may have about the costs of assisted living and recommend resources to help you pay for it.

Simply Enter Your Details to Access Guide

NOTE: Your privacy is important to us. We’ll never share your details nor spam your inbox.

Instant Access to Free Guide

Have you decided that assisted living is the best option for your elderly parent, and now are feeling overwhelmed on how to begin your search for the right community?

This guide will go over what you need to know before you make a decision.

Simply Enter Your Details to Access Guide

NOTE: Your privacy is important to us. We’ll never share your details nor spam your inbox.

Instant Access to the Program Overview Brochure

Get more details about our signature Memory Care program to determine how well it will fit your loved one’s situation. Simply fill out the fields below to get access to the PDF.

Enter Your Details for Instant Acce Guide

NOTE: Your privacy is important to us. We’ll never share your details nor spam your inbox.